Thanks!

Change, uncertainty, mystery...
Thanksgiving was my mother's holiday. (well, Easter too) For 25 years the family has gathered at her home for the thankful feast.
We are heading to Long Beach tomorrow morning.
A new start for the holiday season.
Little nephews adoring their grown-up cousins.
Laughter, nostalgia, chaos, ocean breezes, food, goodness, gratefulness.
Embrace.
Enjoy.

photo via: seal beach

adventures of the young

Chase and friends left Logan at 3am yesterday morning to board a bus in SLC bound for Seattle for the MLS championship. He'll see Landon Donovan and Beckham, but around here we keep our eye on Kyle Beckerman (right) and Nick Rimando (left - he's a Real Keeper - pun intended). They "couch surfed" for accomodations and will get back on the bus immediately after the game to come home. Why does this sound like a good time to me? Ole, Ole, Ole...... for REAL!

I was not feeling well and was irritable and not fit for conversation. I was not showing my best side getting after Land for a messy room and dirty socks lying around. He looked at Darren and remarked, "At least one thing Mr. Peck (his favored 1st and 2nd grade teacher) taught me I know as absolutley true, 'If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy'." I went and got in bed.

photo via: mlsnet.com

Update: It's REAL: Real Salt Lake MLS Cup Champions! At the beginning of the broadcast showing the "march to the match" it was all Chase on ESPN.

smile

These made me happy:

Robin's Clogs by kotki dwa from kotkidwa on Vimeo.

Wouldn't it be a riot to cut and paste and film and sing and create this bright animated universe. I think I found what I want to do when I grow up. Via: Hattie Newman

Go here to view the next video.

Since there are obviously only boys, sans the mom, at my abode we have always cherished Malcolm in the Middle. Land and I were watching this episode together and when I witnessed the Komodo 3000 I started laughing so hard drool was coming out of my mouth. Land just looked at me puzzled wondering what I had been consuming. It is therapeutic to be overtaken by a gut-wrenching giggle every now and again.

plus... a meteor lit up all of Utah late Tuesday evening and I once again thought of the Komodo 3000

found

really, who gets this remarkable opportunity - this is not an aquarium

no good vacation lacks delectable food

swimming out to the bay with Ila, Chilango, Pepenino, and Dune (releasing the turtles)

My turn at charades (hint: crabby)

morning Obama yoga - "breathe the hope"

Pacific Ocean - now that's a beach

Walking from the well to our camp at Espiritu Santos

true vacation - chillin' in the evening

to quote David Spade, "turtle"

Taking measurements

sand dollars on the dunes

Darren and Tessa playing on the dunes

hard to find the words

The whales accompanying us to Los Islotes

Arriving... with little sleep after having a panic attack getting across the border in Tijuana

Saying farewell to our friends from the sea

Me and Chilango

Turtle Guy didn't show up again this year. So who's the real turtle guy... of course Darren

Playing charades before breakfast... can you guess? (hint: sea lion)

This photo cracks me up.

To read the post from last year click HERE

I just FOUND (on the 11th Month, the 11th day, at the 11th hour) an email from Antonio...

"You would not believe what just happened to me. I was sitting doing some work in my house, on my computer. I have to say that normally I was supposed to be outside on the boats, but today I decided to stay and do some work I needed to finish. Suddenly I heard someone shouting my name. I have a friend here at the school that always shouts at me like that, but he is not at the school right now, so I thought it was weird. I went out of my house and to my surprise Darren was running around the school shouting my name, like some crazy guy, jajaja.

I was really happy to see you Darren, I feel sorry that we could not even have a drink together and talk a little bit about Utah, the rivers, the dam dams... I hope we can see each other some other time, meanwhile I am really glad our friendship is still going.

See you later Dee and Darren."

You see we made a really good connection last year with those on the trip with us, especially with Antonio, he was so interesting and genuine and funny and deep. I'm so pleased Darren was able to see him, however briefly, and that Chase was able to meet him. They are off to Espiritu Santos today to swim with sea lions on Veteran's Day. I have hung the flag, Finally FOUND the pics of the turtles, learned the data we helped collect is showing that turtle populations in Baja are rebounding, was told the group this year named a turtle "Dee", and received an unexpected happy message from Emily on my phone... I FOUND much to be grateful for today.

Salude: a note to myself...

Melissa, Tessa and I riding the panga.

Vigilantes = Vigilant for the sea turtles

Approaching our camp on Espiritu Santos

I must admit I adore how the chairs are all set up to face the sea. We spent many many mezmorizing hours watching the pelicans dive, the sun set, and the moon rise from this spot. Not to mention fabulous food cooked from scratch from our very own crew.

Setting the turtle nets in Magdalena Bay

Getting to know our "Shell Island" in Mag Bay

Darren + Hammock = Happiness (at the School for Field Studies in Puerto San Carlos)

Unbelievable: swimming with sea lions at Los Islotes

The day after the election loading the pangas in Puerto San Carlos.

Max and I in the back of the van. I don't know how he can read because I became carsick.

Hiking through the rocks on Isla Espiritu Santos

I love pelicans

This little crabby seems to be saying, "welcome to my kingdom!" {that's for Echo}

note to self:

I voted in the municipal elections last Tuesday. I get excited for voting day. One friend calls it sacred. Another friend is now on the city council. Her cousin married my cousin. I am intrigued with her desire to serve in public office. Even here, in our small town, differing parties of thought are on a polarizing path. It's ugly, rude, mean and I believe damaging. Inciting the masses to be "armed and dangerous" is just mind-boggling. Vote, form an opinion, stand for something and RELAX. Have some fun. Enjoy discussion and debate. Respect. {I'm giving myself advice I have a tendency to become overly emotional when involved in politics} One year ago, Darren and I were in Mexico on election day. We had no radio or television or technical contact with the state of the results. All those in our party were wearing red white and blue sensing the excitement happening in our home country to the north. Later that evening we were shuffled back to town where a few of us went to a tequila bar to grab a bite to eat and watch the returns. The bartender was switching between CNN and Dumb and Dumber in Spanish. Finally, even the locals said, "no more dumb and dumber." Now for me that statement had double meaning and we laughed and toasted to Mexico and the election and to the USA and gave thanks for our incredibly blessed lives. That trip to Baja was magical. Something about the light and water and warm air and the people. Darren and Chase left yesterday to participate in the same adventure this year. I'm staying here with LandO. I'm so ecstatic for them and yet want to be there at the same time. I am a big believer in Mom and Son and Dad and Son get-aways, but oh the turtle tour in Baja is not to be missed. Last year Antonio wrote an article for a Mexican environmental travel magazine. This year the Nature Conservancy is tagging along and turtle guy will be there in person. {I have a total "thing" for the turtle guy} I have to remind myself what Bill Maher said about Obama, "Remember folks, he's not your boyfriend." It's just that he looks good, seems to have a great time and loves sea turtles. Hey, he is the reason we went on the trip in the first place. Chase and I heard him speak at Bioneers. And this gets me round about to my point at the beginning of this story. RELAX, stand for something and enjoy the journey!

note: I posted some random photos from the trip. I can't find any of the turtles or the magnificent sand dunes and thousands of sand dollars on the beach at Mag Bay. Darren and Chase will have to add some new ones to the collection.

boo

Aren't we the festive couple? It was a gorgeous fall day in Cache Valley. Darren's in the background carving some awesome pumpkin... I'm just back from a jog a resembling a real witch. Trick or Treat? PS: I know it is late, but we have full-size candy bars at our house and not a lot of candy grabbers -- what's up with that?

remember

Can't stop stitching. It is crispy cold and blustery outside and I have an ear infection. Megan's grandpa passed away and she is far away in Arkansas. I whipped up a mini-quilt. It has sunshine and a mountain and a heart full of love - the things her grandpa was surrounded by here at home. I put a little pocket on the back and tucked in a copy of the obituary and some fall leaves that fluttered to the ground the day he died. She can add her own little tokens of remembrance if she feels. Just something to keep warm her good memories of her grandfather.

slow stitch

A first quilt. Funny dancing man fabric purchased in Portland years ago with my mother. Intended for Land, but he quickly grew before I decided on a project. [:Lemon, if there are two things I'm certain of one is you're never going to finish that quilt: quote from 30 Rock:] This one I did; complete it that is. I soaked up inspiration and instruction from this book and wrapped it snug with I Love Dirt and left over bias tape. It was a super gift for this young man. I am slow at almost everything. Running, blogging, drafting, dishes, knitting... and quilting is just another of my snail's pace activities. It used to bother me, but hey, Chase once described my family as slow food and Darren's kin as take out fast and we all know that slow food is better [:ha:ha:] So I'll just keep creepin' along.

10/20 + L& = 17

The Land-man is 17 today. We took him to see the real Mr. Dylan last night at SaltAir. I thought he was dressed appropriately considering the occasion. He and Bob had matching hats. I love that he is holding a pillow because he knows it will be a late night and he gets no mercy in missing school for your birthday from his parents. It was a great time. The range of ages and craziness were in attendance, but overall an appreciative crowd. Wow. I can't believe my Land is almost an adult. Time just keeps on moving, "Like a Rolling Stone."

note: I am so into the 'rot your stomach' tacky, store bought birthday treats lately. Land says he'll eat them all himself... he better hide them from his momma while he is at class.

live like luke

I love all my nephews, but Friday night this little fellow captured my heartstrings and pulled them in tight. He was so over the moon that I would be able to watch him play flag football. He would say, "I will play really good for you Aunt Dee" and that he did. But it wasn't the technical know-how that got me, no, it was the unabashed joy. The clapping before setting up each play. The "ready, set, hike" loudly shouted when he was quarterback. The jumping, the running just to run and move and be free. The holding the flag up high when pulled from a competitors belt and the eagerness to return it to a new friend. But what I liked most was the taking time out from the intense four year-old play to wave at me, make certain I was noticing HIM, flashing a thumbs up sign as he walks, no struts, down the field. 'As a little child." I want more of that in my everyday.

I run 13.1

Family descended on our fair town of Logan last Friday. A nephew was married in the Logan Temple. We had a wonderful time visiting and and catching up and falling behind on sleep. On Saturday morning we took off to Heber City for the last soccer game of the season and then picked up a metal shard in the tire on I-15 on the way to the airport. We made it to the dealership just barely on the rim and they loaned us a car to get me to the airport.

I flew into Long Beach and loved up my nephews, talked with my sis til early in the wee hours of the morning and then woke at 4:30am and had her drop me at the Long Beach Convention Center. I ran another half-marathon. One second per mile faster than the last one. Wow! You know, I am soooooo sloooooow, but I can keep on running. I love the fact that the only thing you have to concentrate on is putting one foot in front of the other -- for two + hours. This race was incredibly upbeat. Over 20,000 racers. Bands playing at the mile markers. Thousands of people cheering you on. Running on the boardwalk next to the sand and shore. The announcers were hyper and happy and loud. It was inspiring to watch others cross the finish line. It didn't matter how fast they came in. Bestest friends collapsing in a hug after accomplishing a mutual goal. Mile wide grins and Tiger Woodsesque fist pumps at stepping over that end line. And I felt good. At 10 miles I was all into the positive self talk and was like, "Let's finish this thing." When I reached mile 11 the first marathoner was heading to the finish. I think I like running - who would've thunk it?

Best Wedding Slideshow Ever from Olde English Comedy on Vimeo.

My sister just called and directed me to this video on aol. For some reason it reminded her of me. Can you figure out why? Other than my nephew gets married this Friday in Logan and we are hosting a multitude of family. Awesome.

friday night lights

Three weekends in a row we have attended football games. Last Friday my two alma mater's faced off. We invited my dad this time and were lucky enough to score 50-yard line tickets from a good friend... the best part being able to visit with her family before the game. And then of course my dad knew everyone. These cell phone photos are not the greatest, but they show enough. Just before kickoff the light was just right highlighting the the quickly changing leaves on the mountainside and the massive crowd filing in. Some where in the blur there is a WOMAN official. My dad remarked that she may be the first female official in the NFL. Now when I heard that I blurted out like a petulant toddler, "but that is MY job!" I always thought it would be cool, especially when we were in school. Get a decent salary working the weekends after taking care of kids and family on the weekdays. And then my family and I could have a secret gesture that they would notice when they saw me on TV "workin' it." I remember years ago watching my dad and the officials were in a huddle and Chase observed, "Look mom -- a bunch of grandpas!" Now somewhere in the future he may have to qualify that; making it politically correct by interchanging grandpa's with grandparents. I never thought it was a possibility. Oh another unique observation to this stadium was the "stroller check" -- only in Provo. You gotta love it.

what's going on

My husband had "business" in SLC last week so I said I would come join him on Friday night. I cleaned up, put a nice pair of high heels on and kicked it for a night on the town. In my haste I forgot a brush, comb, and few other necessities. No worries. It was the "fashion stroll on broadway" Lots of funky do's and duds. We then ate scrumptious food at Bambara and went to Keys on Main to listen to the dueling pianos. We can't get this song out of our heads. The above photo of my shoes is not as scandalous as you might be imagining. I had blisters the size of quarters and I was recording a mugshot of the suspects. On Saturday morning we ate at Cafe by Rico, mmmmmm good... and then went home and walked up to the USU vs. Southern Utah game. Perfect weekend nights.

fall

Dilemma: Landlocked backyard with a few dead rotting trees.

Solution: Call a former military man turned tree climber and his crew who derive absolute joy in knocking big heavy items to the ground.

Hick-up: A trunk full of not too happy you're destroying my home "Winnie-the-Pooh" bees.

whatever

Una & Me

Just a little blah lately, well a lot. Megan left on her mission. My friend Una had to move back to Taiwan. BYU got pulverized against Florida St. My car was harassed again.

On the flip side:

• Megan will be a great missionary... she is a strong young woman who is a survivor and loves people, makes friends easily and is joyful. And I write her a note every morning and send it off, so I'm getting my letter writing groove back.
  
• Una brought me a thousand little gifts from "her country." Whistles, jewelry, soap, calligraphy, wallets, cell phone covers, coin clutches -- and much more. We had a good visit on our way to the airport and I have an open invitation to visit her in Taipei.
• My good friend is the "coaches wife" and we were able to talk during the game. Plus, we took my father-in-law and were in the crazy student section and stood practically the whole game with 70,000 other fans.
• People have volatile reactions to my car.... (I refuse to believe it is about me) the bright red attracts attention and the Obama sticker provokes temper tantrums. I was called all kinds of names at the dealership when I went to get the oil changed. Seriously, isn't "pinko commie" a bit redundant? Gives me a chance to not take it personally and practice my "dust off your shoulder."
  

alive @ dead horse point

the lookout

in their own world

Darren + river = Darren

land - a double entendre

walking

cliffs

tree on the edge

sunset - the sunrise was even more spectacular

impressive pink, camping, mountain-biking ensemble

June in August

brothers

they're hard to get, but finally a pic of Chase

engaged

great-grandsons and a new stash of art paper - don't ya just love that koolaid mustache face

[returned] missionary Matthew

Utah is amazing. You could be at sup-alpine altitudes frolicking amongst the aspens in the morning and then within hours be breathing the dry desert air while taking in the red-rock sunset. In August we took part in an OO - Owesome Olsen adventure [inside family joke] at Dead Horse Point. Barren and beautiful. The boys camped out under the vast sky of stars; after witnessing a scorpion scamper past the campfire I was safely zipped in my tent. We mountain biked the new Intrepid bike trail, my brother-in-law was key in getting the trail complete and participated in the inaugural run with the now Ambassador to China former governor, Jon Huntsman, Jr. It was a new experience for me... pedaling on the slickrock and then through the sand. You really had to concentrate. We ate good food, told funny jokes, played wicked competitive games -- Olsen style -- and loved being together. Oh, are you kidding, there was no time for knitting.

I'm Being Followed by a Moonshadow

So my birthday adventures continued into the late evening. An excerpt from Chip Ward's Hopes Horizon ignited a desire to keep track of the phases of the moon... a sort of rhythm to mark time, the tide, moods. I had noticed that September 4th was a full moon and requested a family moonlit hike to the Wind Caves. It was incredibly bright, no need to use the flashlights, dark defined shadows mimicked our steps along the mountainside. The canyon was full of last weekend of summer adventurers. The caves included flight shows from the bats. The boys enjoyed themselves. We heard Land singing as he hiked, Chase kept us from straying from the trail.

Saturday night we had our friends Steven and Doris (our first neighbors in Montana) over. Doris is big into soccer and we could get the Brazil vs. Argentina world cup qualifier so over they came. A few of Darren's soccer players came as well. I kept going from tv to tv to check the status of my alma mater BYU and Oklahoma. Oh Yeah! The Cougars won.

Monday was our traditional Labor Day gathering. We bbq'd loads of hamburgers to feed the loads of family that joined us. Darren set up the scuba gear so whomever chose to try it could. And guess what? My DAD DID IT. And liked it. Just think how he would feel under the sea with the colored little fishies and coral.

Good Times!

climb the wall

It's my birthday today. And I tried something that really really scared me. My friend Scott took me rock climbing. With the illnesses and accidents that have surrounded me lately, I have gradually lost trust in this amazing gift of a physical body. Once my mind and spirit started healing I began to try and heal this tired bod of mine. I've pushed myself past the self-consciousness of body-image and have tried many a new thing.... surfing, running long distances, mountain biking on slickrock etc.

Back to the rock climbing. My legs would SHAKE uncontrollably and my heart beat hard the whole way up. I kept begging to come down and Scott kept saying, you can't come down until you get to the top. I was incredibly fatigued. My forearms were cramped. But, whoa, it felt good to go. all. the. way.

The boys and I are leaving right now for another birthday adventure at my request. I'll tell you about it tomorrow.

blessed

It was Megan's BIRTHDAY. She leaves in two weeks for 18 months to do missionary work in Arkansas. I took inspiration from Amanda Soule's Handmade Home and created a miniature banner. I also made a little bag to store it in. Maybe she can tuck it in her suitcase and pin it up for special moments or for a dash of color to brighten up tough days.

tou/2

5:30am br (before race)

I did it. I ran (a misnomer) the Top of Utah half marathon. I finished in 2:23 something, very slow I know, but considering I did not work out for a year after my mom's death and in May I could barely run consistently for 10 minutes straight and I am not absolutely injured and achy the day after is a good thing, a personal miracle actually. I do owe a lot of it to my dear friend Megan. We met in March. She is half my age. She doesn't care. We have worked out all summer. Bike rides up the canyon. Hikes to the Wind Caves. Swimming. Lots of running. After work-out movies and lunch carbo-loading at the Olive Garden. She is an explosion of energy. Gregarious and full of light. She continually doled out compliments that only a 21 year-old can lead you to believe, "You'll rock this DeAnn." I don't think my family really understood that I was training for a 1/2. Last time I ran one in Moab it wasn't as successful, I was dehydrated, puffy beyond recognition (before the anaphylactic shock), and didn't feel well at all. This time around was actually quite emotional as I crossed the finish line. I thought of my mom, and all the trauma work I have completed the last few years and I think I felt "joy." I was not hungry - if you can understand that. Oh, one other bit of motivation was that my ipod playlist got stuck on the same song for the last one and half miles. It was the perfect pacer and I am certain I sang it out. Loud. Here it is: UY's Moments & Memories (by the way UY is my niece's husband's band and if you watch the video you'll see Land skipping and skanking at :44 and 2:36)

avoidance is positive reinforcement

The children in the valley are going back to school. It is the first time in 7 years I am not preparing to greet students or be greeted myself. My seasonal rhythm is all out of whack. I have an ever increasing list of shoulds and coulds. I'm not doing any of them. I sort of feel bad, but hmmmm not bad enough? I fill the time otherwise reading things, watching things, and making things. I found some yarn in Cannon Beach. The colors of the coast. I knitted Land a beanie - it is huge, but he humors me and wears it regardless. I sewed the slouch bag out of the linen wool and cotton book. It is a pale green with orange topstitching, roomy enough to transport all my projects. I read Julia Child's, My Life in France. Into it. Encouragement gathered about never being too old to try. Saw the movie... Julie and Julia... with Darren... my chickflic buddy of late. It's taking me time, but soon I'll get into the swing of the seasons and start checking off those must do's with vigor and vim. I hope so. When did I become such a crafty homebody? This is not me... or is it? We are off to a family reunion in Moab. Shall I take my knitting?

mood swing

We called this a "family portrait" The boys pictured and so many others become such close friends even though they live hundreds of miles apart. Mike, in the middle, gets as nervous as I do when his son Jade skates. Notice Land without braces - happened last Monday.

Saturday wake up was early 5:30 am. Concrete Rodeo Grand Nationals were in South Jordan (SoJo) Utah. Only a bit over an hour away. They have been in Hailey, Las Vegas, Portland and now they were close to home. Land had qualified in Oregon, at our own park in Logan, and won outright in Layton the week before. Skaters were coming in from all over the western states. We pulled up to the park in a soaking rainstorm, shivering until the water stopped, we went to get some hot drinks with some other skateboarders. Hours later, the park swept and squeegeed, the competition got under way. I glanced at the order and my stomach tied in knots. Land was 4th to go in between the best and most well-known skaters competing. I try not to get anxious during competitions, tell Land to "skate with joy" "do your best" "make friends". I understand logically that it really is out of his hands and mine for that matter, but I have hyperventilated during Chase's hockey games when he gets hit and skateboarding is only a touch lower on the nerve scale. Well, Land went out and laid down his best run of the year. It was beautiful. Put up the highest score of the day and won his age group. I stood cheering all the boys, and chatting with parents until 8:00 that night. I begged Darren to stop at Red Igauna on the ride home. I hadn't been able to really eat anything during the competition and their quacamole was calling me. Reluctantly, Darren consented, even to the 45 minute wait. As we were eating he says loudly, "Bob Campbell." And we turn around and our bishop from Missoula is eating at the table next to us. Now, Bob Campbell is one of the "good guys" in this world and we are fortunate to have him as a friend. He shared stories about his grandkids, and hiking, and work and listened to ours as well. The intensity of the day settled into satisfaction of a job well done and friends well cared for and a little bit of serendipity.

rejuvenation

The mother and son road trip last month was loosely planned. We had originally intended to get down to Reedsport and Coos Bay for skate competitions, but once we hit Cannon Beach my road sore backside wouldn't budge. I know Haystack Rock is an iconic symbol of the Oregon Coast and it acted as if it were a gigantic magnet pulling us to stay... so we did.

Walks along the beach and trails through the seagrass were common activities of the day.

Weathered shingles are a favorite texture.

We enjoy the windblown trees and gray sea-worn wood of this bench built for passersby.

The ocean view in early evening.

Homey architecture abounds in the downtown.

Land sleeps soundly in the Garden Cottage at the Blue Gull Inn. I had my best nights sleep ever. We had the windows wide open with the sea breeze and water sounds lulling us drunkenly to dreamland.

The view from our front window.

Haystack Rock and the lifeguard tower.

I was really on the trip. Land took these photos... Experimenting with the fish-eye lens.

Foam and rock. Such a nice shot.

Wild winded tree.

Singular foxglove on the road to Indian Beach.

We ended the heavy summer days by warming ourselves by a beach fire.

Deep thoughts roasting mallows.

WoW

Dad just sent me a night shot of his new landscaping.
Sigh, I couldn't think of anything to say.

SkaterMom [every skaterboy needs one]

Land and I were planning a three-week odyssey through Montana, Washington, Whistler and Vancouver, and Oregon, but at the last minute the gathering in Whistler was canceled so we went for a week to Portland and the Coast. We stopped at all the skate spots we could. Land competed in Seaside, where we renewed acquaintances with a lot of the families we met in Whistler last year. One of a skatemoms favorite things: Friends along the way.

I didn't get any pictures at Burnside - Land took out a pro who was filming and he wanted to get outta there, in a big hurry, in a big way. Our first park was Pendleton. Cowboy town. I always try to think what the designers are envisioning - what type of line or trick the skaters can throw down. They are getting increasingly more creative and daring. Pushing the limits of what is possible.

The boulder encased in the concrete was clever.

The tranny of this extension is brick. It makes a deep, bumpy sound when the skateboard hits it. I crave the sound of grinding rails, coping, even just the wheels hitting the sidewalk cracks. If I was talented in music production I would compose a little ditty just of those sounds.

I was the appointed photographer on this expedition. Risking life and limb to get the shot.

This is my greatest talent. Climbing out of hot concrete skate bowls in flip-flops and a skirt. Top that.

I am the equipment manager as well. Camera bags, car keys, water bottles, pads, etc. etc. etc.

At Hood River a nice young man offered to take the pic of Land zooming over the opening. He was a real photographer and got the lighting and position perfect. So nice young man, if you ever see this please comment and let me give you credit for this shot. Check the intensity in Land's eyes.

Hood River was was a Hansel and Gretel exploration through the woods. All those 'sweet' skate spots the candy. The ramps and rails integrated into the landscape.

The bridge over the creek was made to skate.

It's all fun and games until someone loses a hip.

Can you tell I really, really like my car? Perfect roadtrip ride for a skatermom.

The minibowl at Lincoln City.

Lincoln City is one of those parks like Hailey, Idaho where "holy $#!* what were they thinking?" escapes your mouth. Land is barreling down the snakerun. Adrenaline rush happens just watching.

Frontside Air

In the door at Irrigon. I was like, hmmm Land you seriously want to carve over this.

We are trying to work out the best position to get a pic. Soon I will be where Land is and holding my breath hoping he doesn't fall and kick the board out.

In the cradle, over the door, no worries.

check that off the bucket list

Indian Beach

Early Morning Surf Session - getting psyched to get in the water

Surf Instructor - Maile

Admire the form and the size of that wave

Seriously, I think I just wanted to have surfboards attached to our roadtrip car.

I get obsessed. After watching Step Into Liquid years ago I renewed my fascination with surfing... re-watched Endless Summer, Riding Giants, and now Surfwise. So when Land and I were on the Oregon Coast last week I signed him up for a surf lesson and the cool crew at Cannon Beach Surf encouraged me to join in over my protests of "I'm too old to learn to surf." I did it. I think I was so self-conscious and nervous that I didn't even feel the chilled Pacific water... the thick wetsuit helped too. Of course Land was expert at just popping up onto the board and riding the wave. It took me a few times but then I got it, thanks to our doctor-in-training instructor Maile and her dad. And... the next morning we went and tried it all by our lonesomes and viola' piece of cake.

It was absolutely head-spinning beautiful. That ethereal morning mist and refreshing cold water. We were at Indian Beach - the Goonies [an Olsen family all-time favorite] and Twilight were filmed here. When I turned the boards back in Mark at the surf shop said to me, "Rumor is you kicked @#$." They know how to flatter a lady. I was so thrilled to have done it, I am only just now feeling the sore muscles and acknowledging the creepy purple bruises all over my sides and butt. Maybe he had actually said you got your @#$ kicked.

So if you are ever in Cannon Beach Oregon, go visit the crew at Cannon Beach Surf. Really, they made a middle-aged housewife's trip. Gotta love their logo too.

this is for Nate

I did find a beautiful handmade vintage dress here, just today... but I wouldn't have even pulled over if it were not for the name and the vivid memory of uncontrollable belly laughs coming from Nate and Darren over an episode of the Daily Show about five years ago. Oh, and isn't Land just precious posing in front of the sign.

ADDENDUM: I was showing the dress to a few friends and the boys told me to start playing my ocarina flute to summon my horse - they totally thought it looked like a costume from the Legend of Zelda. These boys incessantly harass their mother, and it makes me laugh.

my jogging trail is gone

photo via ksl.com

This happened just a couple of hours ago. Crockett Ave. is a muddy river, all the houses' yards are lakes. I went to go jogging and was stuck in the mud. I am sad and overwhelmed at all the damage. I'm off with a broom and a "shuzzle" to go help clean up.

Update: Saturday at 6:30 They think a woman and her two children were in the house that collapsed. So so sad.

Update: Sunday, the boys joined a volunteer shift and shoveled soupy mud.

Update: Monday, they still have not found the bodies, Darren was allowed to walk near the breach in the canal and survey the damage. He is heartsick.

time since... fourteen months

Two of my nephews married two wonderful young women nearly 18 months ago. Both of these new brides have recently lost their mothers. Unexpectedly, gone too soon. One, on Monday before a Thursday wedding, after standing in line accepting congratulations, they then spent their first day as a married couple accepting condolences at a funeral. And just this past weekend the other couple learned their mother didn't feel well while on a drive with her husband, pulled over, became unconscious, and never woke up. This type of shock is obliterating. I want to give her some gem of advice, but know nothing makes sense right now, robotic numbness, that tin-foil shell again. One thing I have learned is that relationships, even mother and daughter, keep growing and changing even when one has "passed on." That in the future there will be moments where memory doesn't take your breath away and tears are not burning, but cleansing.

Two weeks ago, right before my mom's birthday all her daughters were in town. We spent the day doing what we would have done if she were here... Hogle Zoo. This place is forever intertwined with memories of my mother. There she taught me how to roar like a mountain lion. We all have the layout of the zoo imprinted in our subconscious, and thanks to a mom who loved to take her children here we could walk through it in our sleep... and now we continue that memory by showing her family the same "happy place."

The blonde Italian rides.

Daughter and grandson take a round on the carousel.

He must get that riding pose from his mother. (former rodeo queen)

The great-granddaughter who rides only "on the bench"

Don't tell him it's not real.

Happy Feet.

Giraffe pattern, in case you didn't figure it out.

Granddaughter and great-granddaughter explore the tiger's swimming pool.

This guy just made me laugh.

Brothers check out the reptiles or is it a bird.

After only wanting to see the snakes one grandson proclaims, "If you see a snake like this at grandpa's then you go and tell your mom and then grandpa will chop it up with a shuzzle."

Grown-up granddaughter still likes to take a "walk on the wild side"

Gorgeous granddaughter and family

Mom's family, every age, all love the train at Hogle Zoo.

Mr. J. makes funny faces. (notice the little one in the back getting in on the action)

Grandsons spin the "water ball rock"

What a good day. I thought as I was leaving the gate, "Mom would love this." And guess what, I think she did.

Watched Born into Brothels last night, amazingly beautiful while heart-wrenchingly sad at the same time. Becoming aware of situations that exist in the world rends you unable to turn away and avidly pulls you into action. I did read an update that Avijit actually attended high school in SLC at Rowland Hall. If you have a chance watch the film, it will change you.

(photo via here)

at the bird

Darren and I spent the last four days of June at the Cliff at Snowbird. He had meetings for AWRA and I lounged at the pool on the 10th floor, had a massage at the spa and thoroughly relaxed and enjoyed myself. Many people complain about the Cliff being too cold, but the exposed concrete does it for me. It seems extremely Frank Lloyd Wright, quite organic, with the low ceilings giving way to the incredible 10 story glass atrium... "compression and release" is a FLW concept. It fits in and mimics the harsh granite and steep mountains it is nestled into. I also enjoy the Asian rugs and screens and accessories, and it is amazing that they have had "green" roofs since the 70's. It is very retro and very "now" at the same time.

Darren and I were engaged at the top of the tram, so this place has added meaning for us. Maybe it mimics our marriage as well. I think Snowbird's branding is exceptional, simple, geometric and eye-catching. I was hiking up to the top of the tram, but there is still too much snow covering the trails so I eased myself down to the waterfall and decided to throw myself across it. Hmmm, there went all the benefits of the body glow wrap I had had the day before -- I was completely muddy with bloody scraped knees.

The entrance to the Cliff entices me. It appears as if you are exploring a cave in the cool gray granite mountainside. An awesome mini-vacation.

take time

I slept in today, woke up about the same time as my 16 year old. There is no rest for a mom who worries (bordering on paranoia) about a new driver out after dark. I cannot fall asleep until they are safe and sound at home and then begins the cross-examination (I believe it is supposed to be engaged conversation) about the nights activities. And then it takes a while until I settle down enough to actually drift off to dreamland. Said 16 year old went off to work in Bear Lake after wake up. I made myself a nice little brunch. Eggwhite omelet - actually scramble because I cannot flip an omelet, mango with tajin seasoning (love it) and tea. A little bird came for a visit and reminded me to relax a bit... Breathe, Sit Up Straight, Drink Water (my mantra for the past year). I stared at the overflowing flower box. It has been a nice morning into afternoon. Now my anxiety is kicking into gear because I haven't accomplished anything on my never-ending list.

this is old

Chase turned 20 today. Hmmmm... I think I have a problem with this. Puffy pancakes for breakfast and toasts of orange juice for a fine transition from teenager to 20's. No one wants to look at the camera early in the morning, except apparently Darren. Isn't that cake atrocious? Rot your insides much.

He recieved a slackline for his birthday. Tried it between trees in the back yard. Now I'm hoping that once they get the hang of it I don't find videos on the internet of them scaling across some canyon thousands of feet up.

Happy Day Chase. Life is always an adventure with you.

ho hum

I have been jogging a lot. And doing pilates. And lifting weights. Can't say it has changed me much visibly, but I feel better and stronger. I am stuck on Ani DiFranco on my ipod when I work out, especially this song:

HOSM?

Hands On Social Media. I decided to attend a free workshop in Salt Lake last night sponsored by Microsoft Office Live and Kirtsy. I am now on Twitter [@anndeo] and am bookmarking with Delicious. Now to sign up with Kirtsy and use Office Live -- wishing I had known about this when I was working with an editor on my paper. The event was at Les Madeleines bakery and their mini cupcakes are as good as in my dreams [funny, I had dreamt of eating loads and loads of cupcakes piled with creamy frosting the night before]. Lots of creative and curious ladies were in attendance and there was a lot of learning going on thanks to our host Liz Stanley. There are more workshops scheduled, check here for one in your town.

independence

Land received his driver's license yesterday and promptly drove himself to the skatepark to fly. I hope he doesn't try this with the car.

time since... thirteen months

That unlucky number. Teenagers begin. Dangerous territory. But there are those who are always there to navigate through those treacherous times. They seem untouchable, impervious to the pain and struggles that some of us are tumbled into. Saturday, I met up with my next door neighbor growing up. It's always good to have a next door best friend. Someone to get in trouble with... someone to get out of trouble with... someone to tell your troubles to. We had a particular lady in our neighborhood who guided us through those turbulent years. She was our youth leader at church, but came to be so much more. She is ethereal, magical, moves through this world with grace. We babysat her beloved children. When she made cookies she always shared, said they didn't taste as good unless you sent a portion on to someone else. She had these kissing angels on the coffee table. When she was upset at her husband she would turn them away from each other a signal that they needed to "talk" and turn once again toward. She organized the playroom, something I was particularly fascinated by -- all the fisher price people in one colored can, the animals in another and so on, I looked forward to cleaning up after the kids so I could see those colored cans all in rainbow rows on the shelf. Her family became instrumental in some of the big decision in my and my husband's life. She is in my heart always. And Saturday, my next door best friend and I went to the funeral of her oldest son who had taken his own life. A wife and three children left lingering. But, oh my, the mother. I held on to her tight and stroked her hair. I recognized that tin-foil shell, a protection barely enough to get you through the worst moments. So painful to see her struggle and not be able to take any of it away. Her husband in the only word I can think of... shock. Saying to me, you know how this is, isn't this horrible, just horrible. I ponder often of our life stories, we just never know how it will be finished. Unimaginable. Mothers are so intertwined in our narrative. The strongest and yet the most vulnerable. I thought back to over the past year and how I have grieved -- for my mother, gone. And now I grieve for this mother. Facing that wall of uncertainty and questions never answered; why?

Second Sowing by Anne Morrow Lindbergh

For whom

The milk ungiven in the breast 

When the child is gone?

For whom

The love locked up in the heart

That is left alone?

That golden yeild

Split sod once, overflowed an August field,

Threshed out in pain upon September's floor 

Now boarded high in barns a sterile store.

Break down the bolted door;

Rip open, spread and pour

The grain upon the barren ground 

Wherever crack in clod is found. 

There is no harvest for the heart alone;

The seed of love must be 

Eternally

Resown.

HD vision

I used to see like this

And now I have HD vision.

Wow... the wonder of lasers.

multiball

look at Carol the pinball wizard

Last week I had a little get together with everyone from work. You see, Dusty, pictured in the blurry cellphone pic is broke down in Boise at the moment on his way to his new home in Portland and this marks the end of an unlikely, but productive office partnership. I am really going to miss him... you get to know someone over the course of three plus years sharing a 10 by 10 workspace. That was one of my favorite things about going back to grad school and teaching. I felt young again... intimidated, competitive, creative. I was awestruck by the crazy talent of these young folk, Dusty especially. I will miss his playlists, and for that matter his lists, his tidiness, his advice for how to handle teenaged boys, his work ethic, his integrity, and his view on life. We overlooked our individual idiosyncrasies and respected and teased each other relentlessly. We have some incredible shared memories that cannot be replaced, notably the night at the Green Mill in Chicago with Motoki and especially the day we picked up Karim Rashid in Salt Lake and drove him to Logan for his presentation. We were both extremely nervous. We had studied everything about him... how to pronounce his name, his design biography. I knew about his tatoos and their secret language meaning, I bought some of his O chairs off of Craiglist and put them in the office. Dusty knew he was a DJ. We talked the entire way. Karim thought Dusty was amazing, he kept forgetting my name (he did say my face was familiar). Not many people can say they have driven for a couple hours with the designer of the Dirt Devil Kone.

Anyway, back to the get together. We all came with a presentation of advice for Dusty. I showed him how to fold a t-shirt like they do at the Gap and then we autographed it jr. high style with Sharpies. We had a great dinner and then played a heated round of pinball. I reprimand my son's for participating in "imature" guy talk. Well, it disinegrated into "imature" jokes... mostly about balls. I laughed hard. Good Riddance Dusty (in the good green day time of your life way, "not in a creepy weird way").

memory

6:00 am wake-up call
8:00 am breakfast at Dad's -- uncles and aunts and grandpa
10:00 cemetery
11:00 program -- taps is played
12:00 cemetery
1:00 lunch at the Brown Residence -- great food, great family, great prayers, great day!

it's hard to believe...

This innocent creature, who is useless as a Labrador retriever because she can't swim, could be the cause of this backyard adventure...


Khloee walked on the winter tarp to the pool before we had cleaned it thoroughly. We found her standing on the pool stairs unable to move {let me say again - she is a Lab afraid of water}. I had to climb in and guide her out and Chase and Darren "scubaed" in the unheated skanky leaf water to retrieve all the sticks so they wouldn't clog the pump. Isn't the dog supposed to do that? I love how Chase didn't let the air out of the drysuit -- he's here to "pump, you up." He also didn't wear any insulation under the drysuit therefore counteracted the purpose. He didn't last long. Darren on the other hand, was the hero of the day, he is still complaining, but would not get out of the water for over an hour. What is that Seinfield episode about cold water?